Dance, Dance, Dance

Last Monday, Ryan had worked from home and finally passed that darn kidney stone. We were running to Tyler that evening to look at a new sofa because our old one was in shambles, and as I walked out of the furniture store and got in the car, my phone rang and I saw that it was my sister. When I answered the phone the first thing I heard is "They just found Aunt Krisy dead at home." Usually, we are gifted with ways of saying things in professional or in ways that deliver a soft blow, but in the shock of a moment like that, the blunt truth is the only way it comes out sometimes. I was in shock. My aunt had suffered with her health the last few years and with COPD, but she was only 53, still young, and her COPD hadn't been diagnosed as anything fatal at this point. My mom got on the phone a few minutes later and I felt my heart break for her. I loved my Aunt, but my mom was extremely close to her, and was always her protector and always assured her God was going to take care of her. He had, just not in a way anyone ever expected. My mom was distraught and asked me to call my cousin. It's funny how being a cousin is. We hadn't seen each other since my grandmothers funeral on my dads side almost two months ago, and our lives are both so busy we don't talk super often lately, but in that moment when I called her to tell her I loved her and was there if she needed me, she asked me to come to her parents house where she was headed. I immediately dropped Ryan and the kids off at home and went out there. It was in that 20 minute drive when I had time to myself and my prayers, that I realized God had been preparing me to deal with this and to help my family in the few days before. To this day, this is the first time I've shared this. 

We don't go to church often these days, but I still love God and know he has never left me and vice versa, but I am so busy sometimes I just don't take the time to read my bible and really study like I did years ago before marriage, kids, jobs and daily chores took up time. Saturday night and Sunday night before this happened, I was woke up at 3:30 am both nights and couldn't sleep. Usually I would get on Facebook or Pinterest but this time was different. I woke up and felt the need to pray. Emily was asleep in bed next to us and running a fever, so I thought maybe that was why. She had been in the hospital with a bad virus in May and we didn't need sick kids again so that's what I thought this was all about. So I prayed. I prayed God would keep her healthy along with her brother and sister. I prayed for God to help me manage my time where I found more time to talk to him, and where I had time to study my bible again... To show me how to teach my little ones about him where they would understand. And I thanked him for the wonderful blessing that is my family and asked him again to keep all of us healthy. Still, I couldn't sleep. So I prayed more. I felt suddenly nothing but sorrow and I didn't know why. I read several scriptures in Proverbs 31 about the virtuous woman, and read some bible studies from Pinterest about being a good mom. I thought maybe I was just guilty that I had been so busy lately. I prayed for my own mom. She had been stressed because her heart had been getting out of rhythm lately and I prayed for it to be better, and my cousin kept popping up in my mind. I didn't know why, but I prayed for her too. I realized Monday evening that God was preparing me to help my mom and cousin this week and be there for them in their grief to help remind them God loved them and while we may never understand his reasons, God allowed Aunt Krisy to come home to him and we had to pray for strength to get thru that.

The day of the funeral, Ryan was a pallbearer, and not but a few minutes in the kids got totally loud, fussy, and disruptive. Finally, we eased out (as much as you can with 3 carrying on 2.5 year olds) and took them to the car and Ryan came back in to do his part as pallbearer. I sat in the car while the kids asked why we were in the car... And I broke. I wasn't sure how to express to them what happened in a child like way... So I simply said "Aunt Krisy is in heaven with Jesus, and we needed to be quiet so we could hear them sing about it and talk about her." One of them asked me if I was sad, I think it was Sarah... And I told her yes, and she seemed to understand... Then she said to me "but mom, I was about to dance dance dance". I smiled to myself in spite of the bad day, because I know God was smiling down on her and so was my aunt. She loved to listen to music and dance, and could she have, she would've danced right there too.

We are still grieving the loss, especially my aunts immediate family as well as my mom. I ask for your prayers for them, and I thank you all for the prayers this past week. There was an outpouring of support for our family and we thank you so much. If you don't do anything but this- live your life because we don't know how long we have. 

Saturday morning we decided to clean on the porch and let the kids play some out there, and it turned into an impromptu water hose splish splashing time. The babies had a blast, and 3 hours later we finally convinced them to come inside, all 5 of us were soaked and not even in bathing suits. We cleaned up and ran to get tires on Ryan's truck and came back home to swim for a little bit at mom and dads, and came home and watched a movie. One of the fullest days I have had in a long time, but I spent it with my family and was cherishing every moment. Live your life in the moment and make the most of it. I am reminded of Leann Womacks song "I Hope you Dance"... Love God and Love your family and those close to you, and if you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.

For now, a couple pictures of our "water adventure" and a geocache we did this weekend.

Hugs,

Heth 

Back for now!

Here I am... Back after what seems like a million years. Where have I been the last couple of years you ask? Being the busiest I have ever been in my entire life!  I have been the mom of ever growing, ever learning, beautiful 2.5 year old triplets, a wife to my wonderful husband of 7 years, and working full time. As if that doesn't keep me busy enough, I've been busy trying to keep our house presentable, which is pretty impossible with 3 little tornados running around, and taking on other daily tasks. It doesn't leave a lot of free time, but what free time I have, we love to go on weekend trips, feed a Pinterest addiction (but has spawned so many fun things and ideas with my family), and yes, I like most of the world these days have spent countless hours on Facebook, which is what brings me back to my blog and this post.

 I think Facebook replaced blogs for many people, it definitely did for me for the longest. And, it is a great way to connect to people not near you, but so often it turns into more than that for us. It turns into a stalking of facebook to see what someone is up to, or to read the latest drama from people you don't even know or talk to. It wasn't until we lost my grandmother in May that I realized just how much time I was wasting on Facebook checking in on my friends, including those who wouldn't waste a second on what was going on in my life. Don't get me wrong, I don't comment on every photo I see, but I try to be supportive when I know someone on FB is going thru a rough time, or I try to let them know their kids are adorable when they post their photos, and just in general chat with my friends. Several friends of mine or their spouses have been thru cancer and various illnesses within the last year, and it's always to important to me to help cheer them on, because thats what I would want if it were me in their shoes. I've been thru hard times in the hospital or with kids who are sick constantly, or the loss of a loved one, and that support from afar really brightens a day a lot of times. Plus, that's what a good friend does, right? I thought so. I realized when we lost my grandmother and when there was some other facebook drama involving church hurt, that the only people who reached out then were the same ones, (and a couple of new ones I met since getting on FB), who kept up with me or my family before we had facebook, when I  just had my blog and communicated thru email (or in person if we knew each other personally). I think with facebook we have lost a lot of that personal contact. Face to face contact has been lost too, but some of that when your raising little ones and working all the time too, will not change with or without facebook, and those who don't live near won't see you any more often either... But, my decision to leave facebook for now has been coming for a while. If you are/were friends with me on facebook, I would love to still keep up with each other. Please comment or message me your email address if I don't already have it, and your blog address if you have one so we can keep up.

I try to be the best mother and wife I can be, and I feel like I do a pretty good job of it, Even on bad days when I beat myself up because I worked an extra long day that day, I know that my kids and husband are loved and taken care of, and that they know they are my top priority. But, I still feel like I waste a lot of valuable time on the trivial. My hope is that with this blog I can leave the never ending drama of facebook behind that always seems to suck me in for hours of reading, and really connect with those who want to stay in touch and keep up with their lives and families. And, share the fun things we are doing this summer (and beyond) that may inspire someone else to get out and do something fun with their family, or try a new tradition (or come Christmas, a new Christmas tree theme!) Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against facebook, and I'm not saying I won't ever re-join. But, for me it's hard to put it down and I don't want to be one of those people... I want to live in the here and now, not in the world of "did you see what she posted on her wall??? Go read the whole thing!" or looking at every viral video there is, as tempting as it is to read and read... I will still be around, and you will find me most often when I'm online at night and can't sleep, probably on Pinterest finding the next fun idea or project... Please, if your taking the time to read this and know me, stay connected. :)

Right now, we are recovering from Ryan having a kidney stone that still won't pass, and everyone had a throw up bug this past week too, but our new upcoming project is to try LetterBoxing and Geocache... if you don't know what it is, check it out at www.letterboxing.com and www.geocaching.com We are anxious to try it out and enjoy it as a family, it isn't expensive and can be done locally or afar. Our Sarah always says something is an "Adventure", and thats what we are planning for our summer... Full of adventures getting outside and loving life together! After all, why work so hard and not enjoy life when you aren't working? My family is my most precious gift and I plan to enjoy every second of being with them that I can.

Mock-up of our Letterboxing Stamp :)

 Our precious little boy, whose smile can melt me in an instant. :)

Our ever-bubbly, life loving Sarah who always reminds me that life is an adventure. 

Our little peanut, our giggly little girl, and my recent garden buddy.